3 Reasons the St. Louis Cardinals will beat the Boston Red Sox
To St. Louisans, October is synonymous with Cardinals baseball. We expect the boys with the birds on the bat to take us well into October with some great postseason play. As a rule of thumb, Cardinals fans aren’t a part of my diet, but that doesn’t mean that the Boston Red Sox and their fans get a free pass!
Just kidding … I’m under strict orders not to eat humans. I like to stick to a healthy diet of tasty Triceratops and veggies – whatever is in season will do.
|Might as well put away the Boston Red Sox jersey, Cliff. You'll be needing a St. Louis Cardinals jersey when everything is said and done!|
Since I can’t eat the Boston Red Sox and their fans, a little bit of smack talk will have to suffice. My Triceratops buddy Cliff at the Museum of Science in Boston has challenged me to a friendly wager. When the St. Louis Cardinals win the World Series, Cliff has to don a Cardinals jersey. If the Red Sox win…well, we’ll cross that road IF we ever get there. I mean, historically, Triceratops don’t have a good track record against me. Ask my little amigo here at the Science Center…
So this list is for you Cliff, my fossil friend. The St. Louis Cardinals are going to beat the Boston Red Sox and these are three reasons why:
1) I am the king of the dinosaurs and the St. Louis Cardinals are the kings of baseball. Obviously.
I know how to spot baseball royalty from a mile away and the St. Louis Cardinals smell like farm-grown, corn-fed champions to me! My team’s 11 World Series championships, nine postseason appearances since 2000, and now four World Series appearances in that same time span put them way up at towards the top of the list of teams that perform. If we’re talking dynasties, I was one of the original rulers of this land, and it looks like my relatives (see reason number three below) are ready to take over. This will be our third ring since 2000 – the most in the MLB!
2) Like me, the St. Louis Cardinals have killer instincts.
Wacha, Beltran, Rosenthal and Molina have been standout players in the playoffs, but the whole team shows up to get the win – even Allen Craig is suiting up again! Let’s not forget what Craig and the Cardinals can do with two outs and runners in scoring position. They literally set the record this year – their .330 average is the highest since 1974 (the first year of reliable stats of this sort). When it comes to fight or flight instincts, my guys are fighters. Unless, of course, it’s a “Happy Flight”.
3) We’re practically cousins. That makes the St. Louis Cardinals pretty intimidating.
No, really. Analysis of proteins extracted from the bones of a 68 million-year-old T. rex suggests that my closest relatives are modern birds. No wonder the St. Louis Cardinals are a sight to behold. They have traces of tyrant lizard king blood pumping through them! You may think that my little arms would have sidelined me from the field, but let me tell you, I was quite the All-Star in the Cretaceous League!
So there you have it, Cliff. Dust off that St. Louis Cardinals jersey and prepare to pay homage to my hometown team!
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Written by Mr. T. Rex, Tyrant Lizard King of the Saint Louis Science Center